This is a poem that I have written over about a month, I've been trying to put all of my emotions into words, but it's kinda hard because I am so damn emotional...Well, here is goes...I'm still adding to it though...
As I sit here with this knife in my hand,
Wondering if I could ever be more than a man,
The blade seems to shine in the light,
And try as I may, with all my might,
I am not able to win this fight,
All the pain flows through my veins,
My blood, my life, all of it is only pain,
I have nothing left to lose but yet I have nothing to gain,
Cut these wrists and let me bleed,
You're the only remedy, you are what I need,
You're here but yet you're gone,
Somehow I know you've known this all along,
Let me go into an endless sleep,
And maybe then you'll cry the tears you're meant to weep,
You try to hold my body,
But my soul is mine, my soul is something you will never keep.
Tell me what you think of my poem....hope you liked it....that's all for right now... Oh yeah, I'm still not six feet under in my backyard....oh and if u are reading this, u know who you are.... i want to know ..."WHY".....ok? | 
FUCK I AM SO PISSED.... I learned today that I'm not doing as good in my classes as I thought I was, but you know what, FUCK IT....I am most likely going to UH and I have no problem with it... I know that it's not as bad as it may seem, and my parents knew I was having problems this quarter... I guess getting "c's" aren't that bad, but I had higher expectations for myself after getting all "A's and B's" during first quarter, but shit changes, and I'm so happy that I'll be going to LCC for running start.... a word of advice for youngins, bust ur ass trying to get good grades, cuz i started too late...and don't foget to take ur SAT's and ACT's... try to join clubs and play sports.....be a good person, cuz at least if ur not the smartest, being yourself and a good moral person can get u very far...but at the same time try to live a little, dont get arrested!!!!!!! 
or at least don't get caught... -me